HAPPINESS+SADNESS

*Sigh
I knew I'll be feeling sad soon,
Since I had SO much fun today...
But I never expected it to be so fast..

I chatted with him,
And he asked me to kill him before he be Prime Minister..
(We were chatting about his future job)
And I said that I can't kill my #4!

He pretended he didn't saw that word...

Before he offline,
I told him that #4 means my best friend #4,
And he let out a sigh of relief..

The conversation:

Me: You thought what? My 4th crush? LOL
Him: yes
-THE END-

I was like WTH?!
You're so relief that I'm treating you as #4,
And once again,
You'd proved to me that,
Lying to you is a good thing for you,
But...
Lying to you,
Only brings me sadness and hurting myself..

I thought of telling you that I still love you,
But after tonight's incident,
I don't think I have the bravery anymore..

Sorry for lying to you..
I don't knkow why I feel so hurt right now,
I wish I can have someone to talk to...
I don't know why, because of you, I'm weeping silently again in my room,
Afraid that they'll hear me..

Just before I really let go of you,
I wanna tell you that,

I LOVE YOU

although you'd hurted me a lot