WORRIESSSSSS

Zunren's grandpa passed away last Monday,

I was at KL at that time,

And I was worried sick!

I wanted to comfort him but I don't know how to do it,

I wanted to call him and make him laugh,

But I'm afraid because I never called him before..

I did called him before,

But he did not pick up! ><

Anyway,

Zunren,

Please be fine!

My heart was shattered to pieces when I get back my Add Maths paper.. T.T

The marks..

Well,

What can I say?

Lets put it this way,

Only one digit..

And yeah,

I FAILED AGAIN.. Sobs Sobs Sobs...

But there's up and down in life,

So were the tests!

I got ninety plus for Malay!

First time!!! hahahahaha

English??

Damn my english teacher,

I'll make her add marks!

Chemistry?

Well,

It's slightly better than what I expected..

But I'm quite disappointed also...

Moral?

I PASSED! And my marks is only 33!!!

Why?

Because the teacher sucks!

She really really DID NOT teach us how to answer the structures and essay!

URGH!!

History...

Better than I expected too!

I got 76!

And civic is 80..

Hmm..

I think that's all..

And one more thing..

I'm such a failure for being unable to da a simple task!

It's so so so simple!

Although it'll remain the same,

But honestly,

I feel so disgusted, annoyed, irritated, etc. etc. whenever I see your face..

Go away!! Shoo!!!

HAHAHAHAHA

I DID IT?

It's still too early for me to say that I did it.
Because I'm not sure yet.
I said it last night.
I can't believe I said it..
I mean seriously,
No one will believe I said it.

The reason?
Well,
I'm not sure...
Maybe because I think I'm not someone important for you,
Although you're so important to me..
So why would I care?
I'll be more like busy body when I care for you,
Or maybe not.

What had been said, can't be change..
It's already the past,
No one can turn the time and go back to correct their mistake....
Does that mean breaking with you is a mistake?
Honestly,
I don't know.
Ever since I was lied by 3 people, including you,
I feel so betrayed..
Yes,
I should forgive and forget..
I did forgive,
But I can't forget..
It's too much for me..
Even until now,
The feeling of being lied and betrayed is still here..

I had change..
I learn to control my temper..
Now,
I'm someone who don't show my anger easily,
I'll manage to hold it back somehow..
But the changed me is not the kind me anymore..
I used to keep quiet and pretend happy when I was so damn hurt inside..
Eventually, people will really thought I'm fine when they saw me laughing and talking with my friends..
I was hoping someone can see through my act and comfort me..
I had been waiting,
But it seems like such person didn't exist..
The changed me,
Is very, very cruel..
I don't feel sympathy for other people anymore,
Because no one care and sympathy me when I'm down..
So why would I care for you people out there?
You think I'm cruel?
Go ahead,
You'll know why I changed so much once you experienced the feeling of being betrayed.


I'm not feeling well,
It's mentally, not physically..
I don't want to show my friend my troubled looking face.

As for you,
I don't knw how to say this,
But just give me more time to think...
The reason?
Well,
I guess you know..
But hundred percent,
It's not because you love her..
I never care who you love,
Because that's your business,
Not mine..

Bye Bloggie..
I need to calm down,
And think so that I can make a wise decision.

I'm so annoyed with your existence..
I wish you can disappear from my eyesight.
I wish you can stop telling me nonsense.
I wish you can stop texting me.
I just wish you'll stop doing it..
Because whatever you do, it irritate me..

I'm cool when you're fine,
I'm worried to death when I thought I'd gone overboard and hurted you.
But when I think back..
Why would I care?
You don't worth my time,
And my love..
You hurt me more than you hurted me..
I'll try my best to do what I wanted to..
And if I manage to do it,
I'll be GLAD..

TEST!!

So...
Finally an update?
Hahaha!

Tuesday's test were Malay, Modern Maths and History..
Well,well,well,
I didn't study for my malay because it's just rumusan,
But the petikan was pretty hard,
I manage to do it pretty okay,
I guess...
As for modern maths,
I keep on forgetting and messing up the formulas...
I can't STOP forgetting mean, and messing up midpoint with other..=.=
As for History,
I studied for it!
I love History..
It's annoying with those names and events that happenned at which year..
But I just like it!

And today..
It's English, ADD MATHS and Chemistry..
English is one of the subject that I'm pretty good at (self-praising? No, I'm born with it! XD)
ADD MATHS..
I guess I'm gonna fail again..
Sigh...
I'd really try my best!
Chemistry..
I was being a spoiled brat when I was studying for it..
I don't want to study the factors 'cause it's a lot,
I keep on bothering #2..HAHAHA
Luckily,
Factors did not came out..
Pheww! God bless me!!
Hahaha,
Tuition later,
And tomorrow is Biology..
Well,
I hope I do well!
Byebye! :D

TIRED

I'm tired of all this shits.

I'm sick of it.

Stop saying you love me.

Stop saying you miss me..

I know it's not true.

Because there's someone else.

You always mean something to me.

But not now anymore.

Now, you're just someone who's don't worth my time, and my love.

I'm always too good for you.

I'm too good for anyone.

No one deserves me, except for myself.

You don't deserve me.

And I don't need you anymore.

I can love myself more than how much you love me.

You won't let it go?

I will.

I might look soft,

But you'd seen my other side,

The opposite me,

Zeen...

When I'm mad,

I'm not the kind and funny Ms.M/Ms.P anymore,

I'm Ms.Zeen.

Yes,

I have two personality,

I can control Zeen,

But when I'm so tired of you,

I'll rest..

I'll let Zeen take over my place,

And let her do anything she want.

I'll be happy to let her do THAT.

Everyone seems so fake to me.

As in, their existence..

Sometimes,

I was wondering whether is this my life,

Is this my family?

Is this my best friend?

Is this my pet?

I seems like can't believe anything.

Because my life is FULL OF LIES.

But one thing never change..

My love for Zunren,

My love for Micky,

And my Best Friends(#1,#2,#3) won't change.

THE MORE I THINK

The more I think about you,

The more I miss you,

The more I need you..

I need to talk to you,

I need your advices,

But you're always busy..

Should I tell the truth?

A question that I think every singla day.

Should I tell you that I still like you?

The answer is no.

I can't tell you,

'cause it's proven so many times that you're so happy to know that I'd move on.

You're really a dumbo.

What to do?

I'd fall for a dumbo..

Mr.Dumb Dumb/Mr.Zunren,

I wish you know how much I miss you, I need you all these while.

And I really love you..

I NEED YOU

I need you.
Can you stay with me?
Just for an hour.
But I know you can't.